he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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