we made out on top of his cat.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
