I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
