Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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