DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
