I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize