ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
