I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
