So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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