Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
