I wanna passion pit in your ass
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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