this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
