Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Are my feet made of real feet?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
