I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
