I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
It's never too late to be topless.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize