And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
