I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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