I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
