As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize