She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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