Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(816): View more from Missouri

I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.

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(248): View more from Michigan

I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'

(708): View more from Illinois

such a stalker...

(248): View more from Michigan

she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.

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(303): View more from Colorado

i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness

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(203): View more from Connecticut

New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.

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