Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
