White coat. Heels.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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