Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
being pregnant is like rehab
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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