He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
