so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
