these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize