Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
