Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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