all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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