Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
