I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
So squirting runs in the family.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Randomize