Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
