oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
kristin has been a bad kristin
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
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