what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
