let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
