His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
