The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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