I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I'm lost and stupid without you.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
