It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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