We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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