The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
