Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
