I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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