Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
thus making me awesome and them whores
he told me I talked like a deaf person
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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