your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Randomize
