A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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