Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
