Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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