I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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