singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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